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“There are studies showing that kids now are less able to have a conversation and make eye contact. Well, whenever you have a situation in which people are dehumanized, women and girls suffer more. It becomes easier [for boys] to see someone as a thing, rather than a person.” Case in point: the widespread demands for nude photos, sometimes by a crush or boyfriend, but often just from a random guy at school.
During her 2½ years of research for “American Girls,” she was alarmed, though not shocked, by what she found.
(Most adult readers will be shocked, as Sales points out, by how wildly the adult experience of social media differs from that of a teen.
The girl had clearly hoped to cause a breakup, and did — after which Danny took to social media.
“He called me a slut,” Riley said, “and everyone thought I was a slut and everyone started to hate me about that on social media.
You have stories to tell, and passions to share, and things to talk about that are more interesting than the weather.
Get noticed for who you are, not what you look like.
“Especially if it’s like sixth-grade girls posting pictures in their bras.
Or like they use them to talk crap about each other,” clarifies 15-year-old Kayla from Boca Raton in the book.
“We’re on it 24/7,” a 13-year-old girl in Montclair, NJ, told the author.
“It’s all we do.” And while teenagers have certainly always had sex, experimented with drugs, bullied each other and gotten into trouble, Sales is concerned by the way that social media magnifies these existing tendencies and makes young women matter less — they have less agency, less inclination to speak up about the online behavior that has become so prevalent. Our communication occurs more with nonverbal cues, body language,” says Sales.
“And one of the girls told me that if you respond by saying, ‘How dare you? Pretend like you sent them a naked picture they got off the Internet and it’s not even you.’ ”) In a chapter called “Thirteen” (all of the book’s chapters are named for the age of the girls discussed therein), Sales describes Riley, Sophia and Victoria coming out of middle school at the end of the school day in Montclair.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating